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How to use lube for the first time? 6 tips to enhance your sex life

How to use lube for the first time?


So you want to use lube for the first time but you don’t know where to start? Don’t worry! We’ll teach you everything you need to know in this article! You’ll learn how to use lube, when it is necessary to use it and  finally where you should apply it!


How to use lube for the first time


If you are about to have sex for the first time, be aware that stress can have a big influence on your natural lubricant production. This is why it is advisable to use a lubricant during your first relations. The use of a condom can cause uncomfortable friction during penetration. These frictions combined with a lower natural lubricant production caused by stress, could make the first penetrations more painful. It is important to mention that even pre-lubricated condoms do not offer the same performance as a stand alone lubricant.


In short, lubricants only exist for one reason; make sex more enjoyable for everyone! So why wouldn’t you use it? There are so many ways to implement lube in your sex life. Alone or as a couple, it is a tool that will open several doors to your sex life, who knows, maybe you’ll find something new to try. Use it to massage your partner, with a toy, during anal sex or during masturbation. Lube can truly be a lifesaver for some couples.


According to a study from the Indiana University’s Sexual Health Center, the use of a lubricant would make it 50% easier for women and men to get an orgasm. Feel free to try a lubricant alone first if it helps you feel more comfortable. Once you start using lube with your partner, you will discover that its use will not only facilitate penetration but it will also greatly increase the sensations.

It’s important to know that there is no shame in using a lubricant during sex. Indeed, some women believe that using a lubricant proves that they have a lack of libido, femininity and even fertility.



First of all, what is a lubricant? It’s a substance (such as grease or oil) capable of reducing friction.[1]

It helps ease the friction during sex while enhancing the sensations. That’s why lube is the sex life savior and the one unsuspected accessory to include in your sex life. Welcoming lubricant in your everyday routine will make sex an experience you will want to replicate.

Lube is not rocket science, but you need to know certain things:

  • For sensitive skin, avoid products with parabens
  • Avoid lubricant with glycerin to avoid yeast infection
  • To find the perfect lubricant for you, experimentation is the key.
  • According to the website middlesexMD, «for the vagina, a water-based lube is always a healthy choice. Oils and oil-based lubes should never be used as a vaginal lubricant. They will change the pH of the vagina, encouraging bacterial growth. »[2]

Before going out there and buying the biggest tub of lube you can find, buy a small amount and try it first. Take your time, finding the right lube for you and your partner is not a race. When trying lube for the first time, put it in your hands, and rub them together before applying it to yourself, your partner or your toy. This will make it warmer and more comfortable.

Lubricant is perfect for your first time! If you are too stressed before having sex you may notice that your vagina is not producing any lubricant. Don’t feel rushed and take your time. Although lube will make it easier during the first penetration you still want to wait until you feel completely comfortable. Let your partner know how you feel and tell them if you need to stop. Having sex for the first time is a big deal so don’t feel bad if you want to wait or stop completely.

*Quick tip*  A small drop of lubricant in the tip of the condom will help men feel more sensations during sex. Be careful and don’t put too much lube or the condom might slip off during sex.

How to use lubricant

Put a drop the size of a coin into your hands and gently apply it on your genitals. Take a moment to feel the sensations and notice the difference. Notice how the consistency change after a couple of minutes. Some silicone-based lubricant like Platinum Silicone Lubricant from https://50shadesofsexxx.com/  becomes thicker, offer a silkier texture and tends to last longer.

Where do you put lube?

On your body obviously! But don’t stop there, you can also apply it on your partner’s body. Lubricant can be applied almost everywhere; body, fingers and sex toys. It is also safe to use inside. While you’re having intercourse, put it inside yourself to see how it feels. You should especially use lube when you’re having anal sex!

*Advice for the ladies* If you’re partner is comfortable with the idea, get to know your man’s P-spot. You’ll find it between the anus and the penis. Apply lube on your finger and delicately rub the area. If you want to take things a little further you may even try to insert a finger in his anus to stimulate the P-spot directly.

Erotic massage

What a better way to start using lubricant than by giving your partner a great massage. Start with the neck, the back and work your way down from there! Sex therapist Ian Kerner[3] says there’s so many areas to touch and massage like the nipples, the shoulders and even unsuspected parts like the earlobes. If you’ve been together for a long time, you probably know each other deeply, but get to know each other more physically with massages and touching.

The shower

Yes, you can bring your lubricant in your shower or the bath. Some lubricants whisk away in the shower so it’s preferable to use silicone based one to ensure it will stay in place. Having sex in the shower is a great way to get closer physically to your partner.

Flavored lube

Pick a flavor you like, put it on your partner’s body and lick it all off him or her, savor the experience and let him or her watch you while doing it.  Flavored lube can also be used during oral sex!

Be healthy

One of the best way to improve your sexual performances and your sex life at the same time is to do cardiovascular exercise.[4] If you drink a lot of coffee, slow it down because it will make your heart rate up and for men, will make them ejaculate faster. Doing regular exercise will help your sexual performance. Think about doing at least thirty minutes or either running, hiking or swimming everyday and you’ll be healthier.  It is also important to healthier mentally. You need to reduce your stress first. Stress is the number one bedroom killer, so if you had a rough day or you’re feeling a little more depressed one day, do some meditation and try to relax. Also to be healthy, you need to lay off on the bad habits; smoking, drugs, too much meat or coffee can result in a bad sex life. Having a healthy diet and exercising can boost your sexual health exponentially.

Don’t forget the ears

Focusing on your partner’s body is important but do not forget the ears! “According to ancient Chinese acupuncturists, the ears have more than hundreds of acupressure points that stimulate sexual energy.”[5] Caress your partner’s ears but always be gentle because earlobes are a very sensitive part of the body.

women suffer from natural dryness

Even if you’ve been together for 20 years, start kissing like you were in high school. “Kissing causes dopamine levels in the brain to rise, which automatically makes you happy. »[6].

The thing is, even if you’re aroused, sometimes your body and mind on not in sync and it’s normal. If you’re victim of pre-menopause, you may experience dryness which is why it’s important to use lubricant to ease friction and really focus on your pleasure. It may take some time for the body the get naturally lubricated like it can take some time for men to get an erection. Your body is like an engine; it needs time to warm up.

Lubricant is not only for dryness or just for women, both partners can use it to enhance their sexual life and feel new sensations. Use it during foreplays, to make it more inventive and build your arousal before sex. Also, you can use lube if you’re alone, you can use it on your own; rub it on yourself, put it on your toys, there’s tons of ways to pleasure yourself with lubricant.

Warning, lube might not be for you and it’s totally normal. It might happen that you don’t like the sensation, the smell or even the taste and it’s okay. If you have a perfectly healthy sex life and already spice things up in your own relationship, well you don’t need lube but it’s always great to try new things.



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